Its Been A Long Time

Hey People! Its been a long time huh? I guess I should of got on here a lot, because now I have to explain everything that has been happening lately..

Brett : Doesn’t talk to me anymore. Obviously he thinks I’m to much of a low life for him to hang around. My friends say that he doesn’t because he likes me but, still. He asked me to be one of his friends on my Face book, so I excepted. But, other than that, Nada. He doesn’t talk to me, he looks at me, he talks to my friends around me, and when I’m not at school – he goes up to my friends and asks them were I’m at, and talks about me (In a good way) Fucking fantastic, right? I thought so (Note: Sarcasm)

My life as of now : needs improvement. Of course, everything could use some improvement, because nothing is perfect. But still, Back to the point – My friends, are great. Megan is my best friend, yet she has a lot of problems. I don’t think she wants you to know her personal shit, but just to sum it up – She has a full plate of shit.

The Weather : couldn’t be better. Its cold, wet, sometime icy and snowing. with a nice hard wind. at night its Fucking Freezing outside, but thats the way how I like it. Cold. sadly, I had the summer. Imagine that! (Note: Sarcasm)

Song Of The Day : Its Myself Verses Being A Man by Inhale Exhale

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mSoHaP6IfkI

- theres the link if you want to here it, but just to let you know, its hard core screamo. Yet its a christian song. the video is a lyrics video for two reasons A) because the music video is kinda creepy for some people. and B) Like I said, Its screamo, so most people can’t understand the lyrics.

If you remember my friend, Samantha F. from my older posts, here is the story on her –

Sam F. moved during last school year. and now im in eighth grade.

And I still talk to her, but all she talks about is her new friends, so I stopped. I didn’t feel like being hurt. But one time I really needed someone to call, and everyone else, was busy. So I called her. It just so happened that she went to the skating ring that day, and saw Brett, the guy that I have had a crush on for years. She talks to him and flirts and her new friends -whom were there with him- say -In front of him- that she and him should go out and that she needs a boyfriend. She said no, because I like him. and they said “So?” but thankfully she didn’t try to hook up with him. Instead, she just told me that she saw him and that he kept grabbing her ass and flirting with her 24/7. I started crying and hung up on her. That was the last time I talked to her.

-Nice little story, Right?

Oh!!! And did I mention that my mom wants to move 16 hours away? Well here is what I think -

I found out that this summer, my mom has made plans for us to move, 16 hours away. Just as soon as she gets me back into public schools, and I get good friends, She wants to move!! I don’t want to move!

I was actually thinking about asking her if she would put me in the local masonic home, and leave, just so I can be with my friends. Thats how much they mean to me. I love them so much. (no homo) and they need me here. Exspecailly Megan. Im so afraid for her. Im scared all the time about her being alone. I know that she always has my back, in anything. but When I move, no one will be there for me. I cant connect with my parents that way.And Cody is just a little shit. Me and Megan are twins from a different planet. We are like Penut butter and Jelly. I keep having these thoughts go up in my head-
–Im at the new school, and everyone is laughing at me in the hallways. And I scream for Megan, Cassidy, and Lauren, But no body shows. Nobody comes. and I am there, in those halls, cring my eyes out, people staring and laughing. and I fall to the floor, and curl up in a ball, like I do when I spaz, or when I get scared. and still, nobody comes. and I am all alone. –

Lovely right? Its like a reoccurring dream, but instead its thought that happen at any time, day or night, that just set there a haunt me.

My clothes lately, have been dark as always. Black and white, As Always. One day I wore a bright orange jacket to school, and Brett came up to me and asked me if I was feeling okay.

I think thats enough of a update, Oh! Other than the fact that I have been listening to screamo lately.